Taking the Sting Out of Divorce

Taking the Sting Out of Divorce

A Divorce is a Significant Life Event 

What are the first five words that come to your mind when you hear the word divorce? Most of us think first of our own divorce if we had one. We think about our family and friends’ divorces. Maybe we remember being worried about divorce and what would happen to the kids, family, and friends. Any way you cut it, a divorce actively dissolves a nuclear family in two.

Taking the sting out of divorce

Richard T. Sutherland is an experienced Texas divorce lawyer who meets good people at one of their worst times in life. He knows that people feel victimized, failed, angry and uncertain of their future.

Listen to Richard T. Sutherland explain a variety of topics in the podcast section of our website.

Often a newly divorcing couple say they are going to agree to work together to split property and child-raising responsibilities. But for various reasons, things that start peacefully can blow up into intense arguments and battles. Anyone going through major life stress can react differently than normal.

There are several ways to approach a divorce and child custody or child support case so that you are prepared for what may happen. Remember that the anticipation of the next step is often worse than taking it.

Tips for Taking the Sting Out of Divorce:

1. Being Mentally Prepared 

Like every family is different, so is every divorce case. Being mentally prepared for divorce requires being ready for whatever may happen. For example, your husband or wife might have told you the retirement accounts were worth significantly more. Are you prepared for finding out during the discovery process that they have been pulling money out without your knowledge?

When we look at our expectations in life and divorce, hypothetical questions may come up. Taking the sting out of divorce means being mentally prepared for whatever happens, even if it is shocking. In another example, how do you handle someone who was a mutual friend who is siding with your ex in a custody battle?

Because we recommend hiring the best divorce lawyer, we also suggest preparing to handle some challenging information, decisions, and attitudes from your ex that might shock you. Taking the sting out of a divorce can require armor at times. Know that before you know it, the divorce will be completed and life does continue, with you in the driver’s seat.

2. Hiring the Best Divorce Lawyer 

How do you know whether you need the best divorce lawyer you can find? Do you need to be of wealth and means with complex child custody issues? Certainly not. The experience of the best divorce lawyer you can find matters regardless of how complicated your divorce is.

A good divorce lawyer knows how to navigate challenging aspects of the divorce process and litigation. Meanwhile, a younger and more inexperienced attorney might get beat up in court more often which costs you more money. You want the best divorce lawyer who can win for you the first time at bat.

It is important to hire an experienced lawyer whose law practice is devoted to divorce and family law cases, as opposed to a general practice lawyer. The Texas Family Code is a challenging body of divorce and family laws and it takes many years of experience in and out of the courtroom to be effective for a client.

You might enjoy our blog article focused on high-net-worth divorces in Texas.

3. Remaining Calm and Collected when Communicating with Your Soon to be Ex 

When in doubt, let your ex freak out. A great plan for taking the sting out of divorce is never letting your ex see you sweat. Don’t let them know you are upset. Think of your best poker face and when to wear it. Whether you are communicating with your soon to be former spouse about kids, money, mediation or trial, you cannot let them assert dominance over you.

By remaining calm and collected, you do not let the other person push you around and control how you feel. Be prepared for them to call you names or tell friends or family that you are being cold. Once the dust settles you should be proud you didn’t get pushed around.

4. Organizing Information for Your Divorce Lawyer 

Being organized is great for taking the sting out of divorce. Every divorce is different and every family has different information about money, property, and children. Whether you are the one with the files and access to accounts, the more organized you keep everything, the easier your divorce lawyer can help you. Law offices are busy and lawyers have plenty of deadlines on their different cases. The less time your divorce lawyer and staff must spend organizing your information, the more time they have to represent you and work on the results you want.

5. Mediating Agreeable Property and Children’s Issues 

If you are preparing for mediation, understand the process of getting to the bottom line. If you asked for the RV in the divorce but your ex really wants it, are you prepared to go to war over the RV? If you don’t really care about the RV but want to receive your fair share of its value, mediation might be a place where that can be accomplished without spending time and money figuring that out in court when there are bigger issues at stake. The goal of mediation for property and custody issues is to identify the really important issues that matter the most to you, the ones you are ready to fight for.

6. Representing Well in Court 

Even though you may not feel your best, you can put your best foot forward with a smile on your face. It is helpful when a judge finds you pleasant and not particularly memorable. On the other hand, judges are more likely to remember the people who were overbearing and difficult.

Taking the sting out of divorce means understanding that the judge has seen and heard just about everything already and your situation is not particularly compelling to them. The better everyone lets the process work as it is designed, the better everyone fairs.

7. Creating Your Own New Life After Divorce 

After biting your tongue at the right time and wearing a smile while battling over hot button issues you may need a vacation! When you return, it’s time to start your new life as you want it. If you have children you are going to be a co-parent like some others you may know. If that is the case, remember that at some point everyone’s children turn into adults and graduate from high school to move on in their own lives.

While you are co-parenting, you have the opportunity to do it your way because it is your own life. Of course, you must adhere to the court’s orders and custody arrangement, but at least you won’t be married to that person anymore.

Richard T. Sutherland is an Experienced Texas Divorce Lawyer in Wichita County, Available at (940) 691-2100.

In Wichita Falls, Texas, divorce attorney Richard T. Sutherland is known for his experience in being a compassionate yet aggressive lawyer, especially in the tough cases with complex property and family-owned business interests. When you need to get things done right the first and only time, call Richard T. Sutherland.

Contact Richard T. Sutherland from the website or call the office at (940) 691-2100. Richard T. Sutherland represents people and families in Wichita County, Archer County, Baylor County, Clay County, Foard County, Hardeman County, Jack County, Montague County, Wise County, Young County and Wilbarger Counties in North Texas and has accepted cases in other areas West, North-Central and in South Texas. When taking the sting out of divorce matters, call Richard T. Sutherland.

Interstate Child Custody and Visitation

Interstate Child Custody and Visitation Issues in Texas

When a parent with custody relocates to another state, needs to enforce child custody and visitation orders from another state, or needs a modification of parenting plans and visitation agreements from another state, that parent needs an interstate child custody and visitation lawyer like Richard T. Sutherland.

Lawsuits and modifications involving interstate child custody and visitation are understandably emotional. Children are only young and grow up once, and the distance separating parents, children and families can be overwhelming. Every case is different and requires the best strategy for the family to accomplish their custody and visitation goals. Along the way the Court focuses on the best interest of the child.

For an expanded look, please visit the page on our website dedicated to Interstate Family Law.

Call Richard T. Sutherland at (940) 691-2100 for Interstate Child Custody and Visitation Issues.

Richard T. Sutherland Texas Divorce and Family Law Attorney for Interstate Child Custody

Licensed to practice law in the State of Texas, not Oklahoma, Richard T. Sutherland has represented many families with divorce and interstate child custody and visitation issues.

Located in Wichita Falls, the Law Office of Richard T. Sutherland, is not far from Sheppard Air Force Base, where military members are stationed, coming from all over the United States.

When families move to Texas from another state or are leaving Texas to move to Oklahoma, they may have interstate child custody and visitation issues requiring the legal advice and representation by an experienced Texas divorce and child custody lawyer.

Listen to Richard T. Sutherland’s podcast: Military Deployment and Custody in Texas

Federal Laws Apply to Interstate Child Custody and Visitation Cases

The UCCJEA (Uniform Child Custody Jurisdiction and Enforcement Act), UIFSA (Uniform Interstate Family Support Act), and PPKA (Prevention of Parental Kidnapping Act) are federal laws applied in child custody and visitation case with multi-state issues. These laws are about uniformity and cooperation among courts in different states. The Hague Convention is a federal treaty adopted by various countries, setting forth guidelines for cooperation among international courts and government agencies.

What is the Uniform Child Custody Jurisdiction and Enforcement Act?

Used only for original suit or modification or enforcement for custody and visitation and possession not for child support, the Uniform Child Custody Jurisdiction and Enforcement Act is about which court keeps original subject matter jurisdiction, thus having the authority to enter court orders affecting the family.

If for example, a child is born in Oklahoma where the family resides, and the child has been in Oklahoma for six months preceding the filing of a case involving child custody, Oklahoma is the home state that keeps jurisdiction to hear the case and make modification and enforcement decisions.

One purpose of the act is to prevent people taking or abducting a child to another state to file a custody case there, where the parent thinks they might have a better outcome. This practice is called forum shopping and it is prevented by the UCCJEA.

So long as one of the parties remains in the home state, that court keeps original and ongoing jurisdiction in the custody case. If everyone leaves Oklahoma and is now in Texas, for example, the Oklahoma court may be petitioned to move the case to Texas.

Do people ever ignore the UCCJEA? They sure do. Richard T. Sutherland has litigated many cases involving interstate child custody and UCCJEA issues and he is well-versed in the law, its application and exceptions.

Read all about the UCCJEA on our website page dedicated to Interstate Family Law.  

What is the Uniform Interstate Family Support Act?

The federal law used regarding interstate family law and child support is the Uniform Interstate Family Support Act. UIFSA applies to child support, medical support and child support arrearages when the custodial and non-custodial parents live in different states. Under this law, states can work together to establish and enforce child support orders across state lines. This prevents one parent leaving the state to avoid support obligations.

What is the Prevention of Parental Kidnapping Act?

The Prevention of Parental Kidnapping Act is a federal law used to enforce custody determinations by courts in other states. To prevent parents taking a child to another state with an intention not to return the child. A parent can seek relief from court, in the form of specific court orders to prevent the other parent from fleeing with children, preventing parental kidnapping.

Richard T. Sutherland is an Experienced Interstate Child Custody and Visitation Lawyer in Wichita County, Texas

Richard T. Sutherland has focused his practice on divorce and family matters, helping Texas families with complex and challenging divorce and family law problems for many years. He is experienced in interstate child custody and visitation cases and is often hired on by other lawyers with clients who need an experienced Texas divorce and family lawyer to assist with one of the complex interstate child custody and visitation issues identified in this blog article.

To schedule a consultation, call the Law Office of Richard T. Sutherland today by dialing (940) 691-2100. Richard T. Sutherland is licensed to practice law in Texas, not Oklahoma.